It’s not you, it’s them: 400 words at 39 years

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I’m surprised at 39 years old that vindication doesn’t taste as sweet as courage.

That is because in the moment that you choose courage instead of inaction, hope instead of despair and wisdom instead of foolish revenge is the moment that you become one of the greats.

And if and when vindication occurs, your wisdom is confirmed as quiet and steadfast obedience to God, knowing that it is only him who brings calm within the storms of life.

There is no need for fanfare, gloating or “I told you so’s” but rather a deeply satisfying feeling of knowing that you courageously chose the right path even though it thoroughly hard.

In the last year a number pivotal and poisonous moments that I have experienced in the last 7 years have come to bear the fruit of their producers.

These poisonous moments were words that spoken over me and about me and played over and over in the theatre of my mind for many years, always occupying the border of my most clear thoughts.

Unknowingly, I ingested these words of discouragement and negativity and it adversely affected me. It caused me to doubt my God-given mission.

But as I sought the quietness and peace of God’s presence, his love brought me comfort and the clarity of his revelation gave me strength.

Strength to stand up.

Strength to keep my mouth shut.

Strength to dream.

Strength to love.

Strength to forgive. Over and over and over and over and over again.

What I’ve learnt through this experience is that poisonous words are simply projections of deeply broken people who are speaking their truth, their limitations and their fears over you.

It’s not you.

It’s them.

It is hurt people, who hurt people.

Those who are hurting within themselves absolutely project this unto others. Look around you. Can you see this?

The bullies, the domestic violators, the continually and unreasonably angry, it’s them, it isn’t you.

The prideful, ones in love with money and those relentlessly and aggressively seeking power. It’s them, it isn’t you.

As Don Miguel Ruiz says so beautifully in his book the Four Agreements “Don’t take anything personally”. In other words, accept no poison and be courageous. It’s them, it’s not you.

My resolve at 39.

I was at a bought price. I am highly valuable. I am a masterpiece. Therefore I choose the imprints that feature in my mind and thoughts that I will engage.

I am Jonathan Ramachenderan, recipient of Grace.

Unlimited. Unprecedented. Relentless. Abundant. Overflowing. Majestic. Excellent. Uncontainable Grace.

“It is only God’s opinion of us that counts and will thus prevail” – Tim Keller (My Rock My Refuge)

Hello. Photo by Chloe Kerbey

Live intentionally.


Love relentlessly.

Enjoy your health.

And Happy Birthday Jonathan!


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